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Friday, January 23, 2009
Blog Log # 2 (Quote of the Week)
Howdy folks, it is that time again. Yep, 11:59 Friday night and you know what that means… the muthafuckin qwizzle of the muthafuckin wizzle. I would like to start by saying I am “A man, dammit. A king.” Actually, I would like to start with asking “Do you always smell like that?” All right let’s get on with this thang. First, lets talk about things you don’t want to say. “To old to be a schoolgirl, ain’t you?” Why would you say something like that? “What’s so funny?” That’s just awkward. “It’s not fun if you just give it away.” That is a lie. “Finally.” Sure it sounds excited but also desperate. “EUREKA.” Depending on the situation it could just make you look like an ass. Now, one thing that falls into the, “you can say depending on circumstance” category is “Who is that?” Let us move onto some things you don’t want to hear. “Not by a long shot.” That’s just plain harsh. “Oh I can smell what your problem is.” Followed by “That’s going to need some very heavy-duty penicillin.” Goddamned scary I tell you. “They were this close to nailin’ us!” Nobody deserves missed opportunities. “… And don’t wait up.” That sounds a little shady. “Move slowly, you prick.” Whatever happened to keeping up? “Good Lord. So much carnage… in so little time.” That just sounds so absolutely tragic. “I sucked the Capitalist Cock.” Shocked? Yeah, I am too. The truth hurts and I believe we all have done that at one time or another. Let’s lighten this up a little bit with some things you might want to hear. “Soaking wet”… use your imagination. “That was swordplay worthy of the most ferocious Antlantean warrior.” Again with your imaginations and using them. Lastly, depending on the situation “This was an act of war” might be cool to hear. Now, I know you people who read this stuff are thinking, goddamned Rob and his inyourendos! And I’ll admit you could see them like that if you want too. “Is sex all you think about?” Sorry but I had to ask. I assure you, all of these quotes came out of books that came out this week and have nothing to do with sex or fucking. Unless… you want it to be about that, you know if that’s how you roll? I am not here to judge.
P.S. "HAL JORDAN OF SECTOR 2814. YOU HAVE GREAT RAGE IN YOUR HEART."
P.S.S. Beware all you ridin dirty folks. "Just cause your paranoid doesn't mean they're not watching."